Paxil Free

Thursday, September 21st, 2000.

Carol said:

I am just so upset because I was put on this for depression and the depression is worse getting off this stuff. I just want my life back.

I want my life back too. I’m in the middle of weaning, and although it’s going relatively smooth, I can still feel the Paxil in me. I don’t think I’m going to feel like myself again until it’s completely out of my system.

As far as feeling depressed again, I got really depressed after my cold turkey withdrawal — and this is after having gone back on the Paxil. I just couldn’t handle not having control over my life again. This is a general feeling I’ve been dealing with since my bout with post-traumatic stress last year. Since then I’ve gone through a series of experiences where I couldn’t do anything about what was happening to me, and then just when things started to look settled again, I followed my doctor’s orders in July and went off the Paxil cold turkey, and wham-o, down I go again. I’m weaning myself slowly off the Paxil now; I’m more or less standing on my own again, but my legs still feel pretty wobbly.

So I know the feeling of wanting my life back. But remember that the depression you may experience after the withdrawal is most likely related to the withdrawal (you may even feel somewhat suicidal as I did — but it’s the withdrawal; it’s not you). I say this from experience, having lived through it, but “withdrawal syndrome” is starting to show up in the medical literature too.

I went through exactly what you’re going through now, and eventually I had to go back on the Paxil because I felt that damage was being done to my brain every time I experienced an electrical surge behind my eyes. Every little zap I experienced was like a miniature psychological trauma. And if you ask me, those traumas add up.

You may not want to flush your prescription down the toilet just yet. Some people who have gone cold turkey will tell you everything will eventually pass. But from what I’ve read, the more severe symptoms such as electrical surges are more likely to “occasionally” occur with people who have gone cold turkey than with those who have slowly weaned themselves off Paxil.

I obviously can’t hide the fact that I think weaning slowly is the best way to go, but you may want to more carefully consider which is the best method for you.

P.S. (Sept. 2006): I’d also like to remind anyone reading this that I haven’t done any research about Paxil or Paxil withdrawal since I originally uploaded Paxil Free 5 or 6 years ago. I suspect most of my information is still relevant today, but you might want to confirm what I’m saying here at paxilprogress.org before taking action in regard to weaning yourself off Paxil.